Denial and Deception
by The May Waters
Summary: Lily has quietly admitted to herself her attraction to a certain Severus Snape, yet she is in denial when actually face to face with him. With a little bit of deception from Severus might just be able to coax the answer out of her. What will happen between the young teenagers? Takes place in fifth year before the "mudblood" incident. Written for ArwenFairTinuviel. ONE-SHOT!


Title: Denial and Deception

Summary: Lily has quietly admitted to herself her attraction to a certain Severus Snape, yet she is in denial when actually face to face with him. With a little bit of deception from Severus might just be able to coax the answer out of her. What will happen between the young teenagers? Takes place in fifth year before the "mudblood" incident. Written for ArwenFairTinuviel. ONE-SHOT!

Written By: May Waters

Rating: T

Characters: Severus Snape, Lily Evans, and an appearance by James Potter

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**Note: This is for ArwenFairTinuviel who was my 100th reviewer on "Lily's Revenge", she chose this pairing for me to write as her prize. :) Enjoy!**

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**_Denial and Deception_**

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There was no way Lily could refute the claim in any way. Though her mind was telling her no, her heart was telling her yes and it made things quite difficult. Currently, she was trying to ignore the matter by keeping her book no less than three inches away, but his presence was enough to drive her looney. Lily was attempting to keep herself calm and her thoughts on school rather than his pale face, silky black hair, and amazingly thin lips which might just be the right- no, she must keep these thoughts at bay.

"Lily," he suddenly spoke from beside her, Lily hummed in reply, not lowering her book. "What do you suppose a wizard who is an antitransubstantiationalist would do?"

"Well, first off, I doubt he could turn water into rum, could he?" She heard him chuckle lightly at this.

"I reckon he couldn't." Severus' soft voice urged her to lower the book, which she fought for several seconds before giving in. The book's binding fell with a loud snap to the table's edge. His black eyes were watching her in fascination and she found herself falling into their depths trying to catch glimpses of what he might be thinking. Lily searched her mind for an equally in depth question to ask him, hoping he wouldn't be able to answer it and she could pull away from his gaze to her book once more.

"Do you think we should try to floccinaucinihilipilificate of the use or value when discussing these wizards, if they exist?" She was not completely sure she had managed to use the word right, but with him staring at her with eyes like burning black fires- it was almost impossible to concentrate. It had been two years and she could not keep herself in denial for much longer, ever since the welcoming hug went awry. There was something about Severus, something she could not find in any other man or boy. It was unidentifiable, but if she were to find it in someone else she was sure she would not be able to keep herself at bay.

"Only if they were a threat to the wizard society." Severus dipped his head back towards his homework for Transfiguration. They often swapped uncommon words like this in order to test the others knowledge. It often confused those daring enough to eavesdrop on their conversation. There were many bonus' to their strange study technique, but neither minded as it only increased the time in which they were studying together- for personal or educational reasons.

Lily tried to return to her book, but she was at the point of no return. Looking into Severus' eyes had been a mistake she would regret for the rest of the day. They were swirling black pools of emotion or nothingness. It was too easy to lose oneself inside. To search the endless rioting emotions, battling to overtake and show their true colors for longer than a millisecond. Even to swim in the depths of darkness, searching and yearning for the light within and hoping against hope it might reveal a deeply hidden secret. With a sigh Lily began to clean her books, quills, and parchment back into a neat pile which she would slide into her bag.

"You're leaving for the day then?" He looked back up, a piece of black hair attached to his cheek and nose. Lily giggled and plucked it off his face so it fell back into place.

"I am," She hesitated for a moment wondering if she should confide. "It's an infinitesimal matter- I just can't seem to be able to concentrate on my studies today."

"I see," Severus made to go back to his homework, before thinking again. "I will see you tomorrow, here."

"As always," Lily replied with a small shake of her head and a smile; then she was gone, leaving Severus alone in the Library.

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"So what does antitransubstantiationalist mean?" A voice called down the hallway. Lily bit back a groan, she knew the speaker quite well and in her state was unfit to face him in anyway. There were unforgivable times in which she could find herself as easily lost in his hazel eyes, just as she had bathed in Severus' not long ago. Something about this boy pulled her unwillingly in as his heart seemed to be worn in his eyes and not on his sleeve as one's heart should.

"Go away Potter!" She snapped, quickening her pace slightly. Despite her efforts though, he easily fell into step beside her.

"You two were exchanging words of undying love then?" James Potter pressed, hoping it wasn't true.

"If you want to know, why don't you go look the word up in the dictionary?"

"Wouldn't know how to spell it Evans-dearest."

"Potter!" Lily warned closing her eyes, her jaw tightening.

"Alright, just came to ask you if you'd be willing to help us boys with the spell we learned in charms today. We're all having a bit of trouble with it,"

"Never in a million years," She retorted with a smug smile.

"Fine, I'll leave you to your thoughts." James was gone, slipping through a hidden passageway without her noticing. Lily cursed under her breath as she slid down the last corridor to the moving staircases.

"Lily," Severus greeted as she took her usual spot in the sunniest chair at their table.

"Sev,"

"I have something I'd like to discuss with you," He stated standing up and clearing away his books.

"I'm assuming you want this conversation to be private then?" Lily asked, her Charms textbook hovering above the lip of her bag uncertainly.

"It would be quite preferable." Severus replied watching as she swept her short red hair back behind her ear and returned the book to her bag.

Lily followed him to the first unlocked classroom. She sat on one of the desks, her bag lay forgotten on the floor next to it. She leaned back on her hands and turning her face up to the ceiling. Severus' eyes followed the curve of her throat, the twitching muscles in her jaw, and finally settled on her red, wet, and minimally plump bottom lip.

"What did you want to talk about?" Lily asked tilting her head to the side so her green eyes locked onto his midnight orbs. He swallowed thickly, this was his moment- this was his chance!

Severus opened his mouth and took a deep breath before starting. "There's this girl,"

"There's always a girl," Lily smiled and turned away from him again.

"Well, I really like her,"

"What are you going to do about it?" Lily asked hoping he was talking about her, it would make all her feelings for him a lot easier to admit.

"I was hoping you could help me with the details," Severus admitted; an idea struck him then. He could play her, deceive her into believing he liked someone else- bring out the jealousy within her.

"Care to tell me her name?"

"Not particularly," Severus waved it off.

"Physical description?"

"Slytherin house, brown eyes, long, dark brown hair. Pretty," He watched her out of the corner of his own eye.

"Marietta Brawnsheer?" Lily prompted.

"Uh, no. She's not in our year,"

"I see," Lily pondered his words. Either he was telling the truth or he was playing her. If he was playing her, perhaps she should send it back at him. Maybe it would lead to him admitting his true feelings, or she would solve the puzzle now and be able to move on from her strange obsession and fascination with Severus. "I must admit something to you too,"

"It is?"

"I like this one boy, he's blond and very tan, muscular. In Gryffindor you know,"

"Ah," Severus saw what she was doing. He could do it now, quite simply.

Lily's head rolled towards him. Gulping quite loudly he leaned forward and slid a hand around her neck. Lily slid towards the side of the desk slowly to bring them closer together. Her head tilted down slightly, her hair swinging forwards to curtain her face. Severus' hand travelled up into her hair and pulled her to him, his other hand landing on her hip. His lips brushed teasingly over hers and he heard the gasp escape Lily's lips. Unable to hold herself back Lily pressed her mouth firmly against his. Severus' eyes flew open in shock before closing at her touch. His lips were quite soft despite their marble looking quality. Lily could feel the tip of Severus' nose pressing gently into her cheek. She pulled back only slightly to get her bearings and decide if she was willing to let it go any further. Before she could decide Severus had pulled her back against him, his tongue sweeping against her supple lips. Lily opened her mouth in surprise before joining him in the two membered tango. All too soon Severus pulled away and stepped back quite a ways.

"This will be our secret then?" Lily asked, staring at the floor, her breathing still heavy.

"Our dirty little secret,"

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_Mudblood. Mudblood. Mudblood. Mudblood. _The word echoed continuously around in her head. Severus had made her think he loved her, made her hope they had a future, made her believe he would choose her over anything else. He had completely deceived her and left her in the dust. Lily should've kept her feelings inside her, kept herself living in denial, perhaps the pain would not be as harsh. She would now choose a different path, different friends, let herself have fun. Yes, she would change just as he had; the pain he had gifted her would not affect her, she would not permit it to. His dark eyes would no longer plague her dreams, she would not be Alice lost in a rabbit hole. No, she was Lily Evans, not anyone else and no one would dictate her life.

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**Note: Lily does in fact have short hair in fifth year. I don't know about the other years, but if you read Snape's Worst Memory carefully, it does say short red hair. Just a note before any of you flame it. I hope you all enjoyed it! Please review! Congratulations ArwenFairTinuviel! ~May**


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